I couldn't parody this if I tried

in "stuff that I couldn't make up if I tried", S&P has put Moody's on downgrade review

Can't parody this stuff

So apple issues an advisory on how to hold your iphone to avoid reception problems and dropped calls. Hold the lower left corner at an angle of 56.77 deg with your body facing the NE direction and with your right foot lifted in the direction the closest AT&T tower.

 

Steve Jobs wrote that "All phones have sensitive areas. The problem is thought to be particularly acute for left-handed owners who naturally touch the sensitive area."

 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/8761240.stm