Political humor

I have a plan to end the war in both Iraq and Afghanistan. Here's what we do. We bring all our soldiers home. We send in our investment bankers. They'll screw up the place in six months. Six months!" --Jay Leno

"President Obama is everywhere, isn't he? I mean, last week, he was on our show. Sunday night, he was on '60 Minutes.' Tuesday night, he held a prime time press conference. And last night, he was on 'Lost,' trying to sell his economic plan to the people on the island.'" --Jay Leno

"President Obama held an online town hall meeting today, the first time a president has ever done that. This would allow anyone online to participate, unless, of course, you have AOL. Then you're screwed." --Jay Leno

"Former Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson is writing a book about his role in the Bush administration during the economic crisis. It's weird, the book starts on Chapter 11. That's odd." --Jimmy Fallon